So about the Beach…

Yes, it’s a beach trip. Yes, it’s a date with Jesus. Yes, it is soul time. Yes, it is heart time with other women (don’t let that scare you.) Yes, it is a deep breath, a belly laugh, a new vision, a creative outlet, even a few walls are torn down. It is worship and teaching. It is Yes and Amen Retreat at the Beach.

I don’t really know why this is such a profound time…But women from all ages and stages overcome their dreaded fears of “other women” and we soak in the presence of God. And it changes us all.

There is time to walk on the beach and gather shells. Time to  journal. Time to share thoughts and ideas. Time to be creative and stretch yourself. Time to pray for yourself and others. Maybe most of all, it is time to listen to the One our souls love. And the beach is the perfect place to hear him.  In a very real way, this is time you set apart to be with God. And that in itself is profound.

So you are formally invited. To step out, to draw near. To risk and be rewarded.  But seriously, don’t wait too long. The spaces are half full already. Continue reading

Dear Blackberry Farm, It’s Still Porn…

Whether it is the Super Bowl, the Playboy Mansion, or Blackberry Farm,  presenting women as objects, reducing their whole person to body parts for male stimulation and pleasure is still porn and it’s still wrong.

Some local news outlets applauded the prestigious Blackberry Farm for receiving yet  “another accolade”  for excellence because they provided the backdrop for the latest Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition.  On the contrary, it seems they have cheapened their reputation by being an upscale Hooters.  For an organization dedicated to the highest quality possible, they have dropped their standards to such a degree that I have to wonder, is the publicity worth it? No wait, is the degradation of women worth it? Evidently, sadly, yes.

Men behaving badly is the same regardless of your locale.stop porn  This is so painfully obvious that it is near ridiculous to even have to write it out in black and white.

Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition is not art. It’s not benign. It’s not harmless.  Neither is sex trafficking, or adultery, or porn addiction.

It kills women, children and men. It breaks marriages and lives apart.

For what? An orgasm.  Are you kidding me? Continue reading

Is Forgiveness Real, or Not?

I really blew it with my kids yesterday.  Blame it on a toxic cocktail of hormones,  fear and the need to control.  Or.  Let’s just get real.  It was my loss of self control. 

Either way, when my emotional tornado passed, all of us looked and felt like one of those house-splintered aftermath scenes. They were hurt.  I was hurt. And I was pretty sure the Lord was sad too.  There was  a lot of debris to clean up.

As I made dinner, the scene replayed in my mind: my words, their faces.  My choices, their hurt. Over and over it played. My heart was breaking. I love my girls so much. And yet…I still said those horrible things.

“What do I do now??” I asked the Lord in a near panic.

Of course— I would ask my girls  for forgiveness.  But how do I be different next time? I was in a state of shock and disbelief.

Had He taught me so much only for me to lose it in a moment? Did His love not really matter when I needed it most? Was I ever going to learn how to deal with my emotions in a healthy way in the heat of the moment? Continue reading

Why More Sex Doesn’t Fix Porn

It makes me sick when pastors tell wives that if they had been sexing their husbands enough, then their husbands would not have turned to porn. But it makes me violent when pastors tell these now broken, betrayed wives that it is their duty to keep giving their porn addict husbands sex to make them better.

These same pastors misquote scripture to further beat up these wounded women. Well played guys.  Because orgasm is the god of the age.

One commonly misused passage is 1st Corinthians 7: 1- 7 Continue reading

When Women Get in Motion

We are born for motion.

And sometimes, oh how we fight it. After much resisting and arguing with God, I finally relented and went back to Jazzercise.  He  asked me to “love what He loves” which is His language for “Jana, take care of yourself.”

Selah…Are you loving what He loves?

So needless to say, I’m ba-a-a-ack, and man, He talks to me a lot while I  huff and puff and sweat. Think physical and spiritual workout at the same time.  While I shed fat and gain muscle, I shed lies and gain mental muscle too.  The first two weeks were brutal but worth it.

I ran into “her”,  got a new pair of shoes, and got a new inspiration. Whew, He was busy… I forgot He was so committed to my health (and your health). Continue reading

Do you want to be free, or not?

So yesterday morning my cat, Dante, brought  in a full grown chipmunk.

I heard the scrambling and the screeching and I ran to see it just in time as the poor chipmunk leaped from the cat’s mouth as Dante fumbled down the stairs.

(Why the cat felt the need to bring it downstairs is unclear and absurd. Getting in the cat door with a full grown animal is impressive enough, but down the stairs? Anyway…)

Immediately the other cat, Leonardo, and the dog, Lucy, were on high alert, sniffing and running after the poor creature who is also on high alert. The chipmunk is panicking and smelling and trying to find someplace to hide quickly. With a lunge, it ran behind the piano.

I am too am now on high alert. I put one cat in the bedroom and closed the door. I put the other cat upstairs. And closed the door. I put the dog in the crate and closed the door.

For the chipmunk…I opened the basement door. Wide open. Empty room with a open door

It did not budge.

I got a broom and tried to gently push it out from behind the piano so it can see the open door. See the freedom.  But the broom was too short.

And so we stood there. The chipmunk and I.  It was hiding and cowering. I was standing there waiting, hoping it would smell the scents of the freshly rained on morning and peek around the piano and see freedom.

“Okay buddy. It’s all on you. I have done all I can.”

I removed the obstacles. I opened the door. The rest was on the chipmunk.

Freedom is choice.

For the chipmunk. For us.

We can cower in fear all our lives. We can hide in dark places and feel sorry for ourselves.

Or we can peek around the corner and see that God has already bound our tormentors and has opened the door to freedom. Wide open. The rest is up to us.

Choose freedom today. Freedom from anxiety,  anger,  self pity and even sadness. There is a fresh newly rained on morning awaiting. All you have to do is go through the open door.

The chipmunk finally did. So can you.

 

Photo Credit: tellthemisaidsomething.com

 

 

“All the Lonely [Women]…Where do they all come from?”

(Guys. Because most of you only need one friend, and a spare, you are excused from this conversation.  Unless you are married. Then you need to read this for your wife’s sake.)

Why do we do this to ourselves?  We are so lonely. We have this ache and groan for friendship, deep heart connections, spurring one another on…But it is so hard to make it happen. Why? I’m afraid the answer will not be easy going down.

As much as we want to have an excuse…we really don’t. We are lonely.  But I think we are lonely by choice.  Take a deep breath.  Keep reading.

My friend and I just said that we needed more community and we agreed that it was hard to do—hard to find. As I drove off, I thought to myself, ‘it’s hard to find community because I am so picky.”

How about you? (Be honest…)  We don’t like this group because they are immature. Or that group because they’re fake. This group because they are shallow. That group because they are so goody goody—too serious—too wild—too Christian—too old—too young. Really?

Oh my goodness… I make myself tired. And lonely. How about you?  Do you know the number one comment I hear from women who need community?

“Nobody gets me, it’s too risky.”

I used to think we were too busy, which we are, but the bigger issue is the self-made hurdles we construct to keep us in and others out. We are afraid of getting hurt. So we isolate and assume that “nobody cares about me.”  We use  these hurdles to make it impossible to connect: Children, work, church, husbands, homework, cleaning house.  I am guilty of many of these. And you?

IMG_2593Yes, those those things are valid and demand our investment,  but we make time for the things we truly want and need. Sounds crazy, but when I am out of toilet paper I tend to make time to get some. Why? It is way up on my crucial list of “got-to-have-it.” Then why do we go so long without friend connections?  We are women. We got to have friends. And generally, a lot of them.

I am hearing a verse surface in my spirit. “We love because He first loved us.” (1 John 4:19)   I wonder if that is our model for community?

We first love others and then they love us. That’s a novel idea. We do community to give love instead of to get love. “But how?” says my friend-deprived heart, “I am empty. Dried out. Needy.”

Uhm… that’s not what friends are for. That’s what Jesus is for.

Jesus is the friend who gives me help and worth and comfort.  The earthly friends are gifts from God to keep me and you company in the process and journey of life. They are icing on the cake. Not the cake.  I have received and given counsel and encouragement and laughter from many friends over the years. But not even a thousand earthly friends can fill the place reserved for Jesus.

So here are some action items.  I am talking to myself as well as to  you.

1) Stop feeling sorry for yourself.  You are not the only lonely, busy, misunderstood woman out there. Go to Jesus and look for His comfort. Then—

2) Reach out to someone. Not with a motive of what you are going to get, but reach out and bless someone. Pray for them and tell them you love them. Don’t put any obligations or demands on them to respond. Love others first just as Jesus loved you.  Watch how that starts coming back to you.

3) Purposely schedule some friend time in the very  near future. Make a date with a new friend, old friend or could be friend.  And then keep the date. How many women do I know who flake out at the last minute?  Unless you are in the ER, keep the friend date.

4) Get a list of women and start praying for them. When you get the “friend ache” let that be a trigger to pray. God will meet you in your need as you intercede for others.

5) Last one…humble yourself.  Stop discounting other people. If God lives in us all, then the people all around us are potential friends. Maybe not BFFs. But they are people that could walk a stretch of the journey with us. If we learned to savor people a little more, we might stop dismissing the opportunities that God is giving.

You know I am so glad my friend broke the ice today and glad she reached out to me.  She just spilled out through her tears that she needed some friendship.  I had no idea. But her comments  were like a shock treatment.  I kept thinking, “Me too!”   And I realize, I have a choice. So do you.

Let’s get out of that stuck place. And choose to be connected. We need each other.

 “Let us love one another, for love comes from God.” ( 1 John 4:7)

(Another thought:  if you don’t have any place to start, then come to  the “I Need More” Class on Tuesday, September 30th. It’s a great place to meet some diverse and wonderful women. I am honored to walk with them. )

 

 

 

 

 

Will the Church Rise Up and Be the Church?

So I have to ask. Have any of your pastors paused for a moment “during church” to pray for the evil of the moment? Has anyone, as the shepherd of the flock, given Godly instruction on how to prepare for the days we are living in? I am not talking fear and panic, or blissfully vague.  I’m talking about instructions on how to stand in the power and authority of our Risen King and how to defend and diffuse the attacks on our country, family and faith.

Now more than ever, we don’t need to look to the government to rescue us. Yes they should— according to our Constitution. Will they? That remains to be seen. But the government is not our Savior. Now more than ever, people need to see the Church rise up in confident faith in the God who is and was and is to come.  We must wake up. Stand up and lead. We must be the agents of peace and His divine Grace.

I am concerned that the church is, collectively, more focused on:

  • Distractions about buildings, budgets, and attendance
  • Criticisms about other Christians who may not be doing church in the same way, or are even “heretical” in their view
  • Programs and entertainment within our “four walls”
  • Territories, turf wars, and who gets the credit.

There seems to be a general confusion on what it means to be a Christ follower and still defend your family. The unasked questions hover in an uncomfortable way— “Is it Christian to protect yourself and family from harm, or, does ‘turning the other cheek’ apply here?” Can I love Muslims  in the name of Jesus and still want stop ISIS?  What’s more, there is an odd denial that our children could ever be at risk of murder just for claiming the name of Jesus.

I say again. We must wake up. Stand up and lead. We must be the agents of peace and His divine Grace.IMG_8936

Please hear me.   I am compelled by a Holy Roar that we must walk in the Truth we have been given. To do that we must rightly frame our lives from God’s perspective and prepare accordingly.

Nothing New Under the Sun, And Yet

ISIS is driven by the same murderous spirit that has roamed the earth from the beginning. But it still is the very real evil of our day. So what are going to do about it? What is the church preparing for? Is our goal only salvation of souls— so that when we get killed we will all go to heaven? Is that it?

I hope not.

All through history God raised up mighty warriors who did the unthinkable: faced unspeakable odds in remarkable times. Let me refresh your memory.

  • The Hebrew Children in Egypt.
  • David.
  • Gideon.
  • People of the Catacombs.
  • Luther.
  • Corrie Ten Boom.
  • Dietrich Bonhoeffer.
  • Present Day Children in Iraq and Syria.
  • And so many more…

All of these people were just like us. No more. No less. And when evil invaded their realities they had the same fear, same faith, same need for God to show up Big on their behalf. And He did. We do well to review their  stories of faith and might as we face the very real darkness and danger.

Faith in Action

One striking thing about each of these heroes of the our faith is that they took action. Risky, costly, prayer-filled action. So can we!

  •  What if churches and their leaders organized  a community prayer time? Opened the doors, linked arms, invited all denominations in and prayed for the peace of God to rule and to guide in these days. What if we offered our non-religious community a place of rest and comfort?
  • What if churches and their leaders stopped every Sunday to speak the name of Jesus over the slaughter and destruction? I mean actually  deviate from the “agenda” to acknowledge the issues.  I often pray for the worldwide church during worship on Sunday mornings because I know many churches all over the country are meeting. So what if we all collectively commanded the darkness to flee?
  • What if churches and their leaders talked about martyrdom and what it is and How it is? I remember hearing stories from China and Romania who have and still suffer from extreme persecution. One pastor said, “persecution is good for the church.”  How so?

Because we tend to shed access baggage when our lives are on the line. Boiling your whole life’s worth down to one person, Jesus,  makes things incredibly simple. Jesus plus nothing. Are we leading this radical life as churches?

I wonder when does “something” become important enough to interrupt “our regularly scheduled program.” Are we even remembering our fallen brothers and sisters at all?

I wonder are we so busy “protecting our children from upsetting news” that we are not preparing them to stand? You can be sure that parents in war zones are telling their children life and death reality. Children are dying just because they love Jesus.  How will our children stand if they don’t even know?

God Is Working Always

I would like to offer some thoughts God has given to me as I have been interceding.  I have poured out my heart and said, “Father, how do we walk in these days? How do we advance the Kingdom instead of hiding in fear?” These are things He has  revealed to me.

1) Prepare to be generous. Every time there is a crisis, fear drives people to do crazy things. So stock up and prepare to share your blessings. Whether that is faith or food, peace or shelter, be ready to give from your abundance.

2) Prepare to be courageous.  God is still on His Throne therefore we walk in a bold hope and confidence. Courage is not the absence of fear, but doing the brave thing even though you are afraid. Now is the time speak up and speak out about the heinous acts we are witnessing. It’s not someone else’s problem to fix. It’s ours.

3) Prepare to be heard. God has established a governmental system. So we need to call and email our Senators and Representatives. They need to hear from us that we expect them to do the right thing.  Often Christians abdicate civil duties because they don’t like who is in office. Do it anyway. Remember? Of the people, by the people, for the people.

4) Prepare to be well loved.  Over and over, Jesus said, ‘never will I leave you.” God has been faithful to every generation and He will be faithful to us as well. Look for His Goodness and His Protection in the smallest of ways.  He loves us with an everlasting love and I think if we talked to those who have walked through these horrible situations, we would hear that “they overcame the accuser by the Blood of the Lamb and the word of their testimony.” God will meet us in our need.

Sisters and Brothers, let us shake off complacency and comfort zones.  We must rise up. Pray without ceasing. Encourage your pastors. , Call your elected officials. Talk to your children. Love God in all circumstances.  Love your enemies.  Amen and Amen.

Because of the increase of wickedness, the love of most will grow cold, 13 but the one who stands firm to the end will be saved. 14 And this gospel of the kingdom will be preached in the whole world as a testimony to all nations…” Matthew 24

 

 

Tuesday is the Day for New Class— “I Need More…”

Soooo. Nothing like a little stumble to keep you humble. In my thrill of making announcements I missed one little glaring detail. I am not available on many Mondays. IMG_8441

So here is the UPDATED new announcement. And I am still super thrilled to get to be with God’s women.

I really feel like God is calling His women to an awakening. So many I talk to are really frayed, dried out or tied up in knots. He is wanting us to come sit in His presence for a deep breath, a new perspective, a safe place to heal. He wants us to come into the deeper waters for life.

“I Need More…”  is a new class that begins September 16 through November. We will meet every other TUESDAY night at Greenbrier Club House, from 6:30-8:30. The address is 1505 Greenbrier Ridge Way, Knoxville, TN 37909.  Very convenient at the Papermill exit off I-40.

What you can expect: soaking worship, the presence of the Lord, other hungry women who want more of God, and real life topics. It’s for women who have that yearn in their gut for something better, deeper; for women have gone numb; for women who need some freedom finally; for women who are ready to go to the next level.

Please pray with me that the women who are hungry will come, and thank God with me that He will feed those who do.